Time to adjust the scales for healthier weight standards

Cast aside the images of large men and women that first enter your head when the topic of weight rears its ugly head. Many popular newspapers and magazines in the West have fully embraced the obesity apologist movement. Being extremely fat is to be accepted among politically correct circles these days.

It's not the human cattle grazing at the nearby junk food chain or those waddling down the confectionary aisle in the supermarket that one wishes to question, though. Undeniably they are incredibly unhealthy and need to take drastic action if they wish to function normally in society.

The puzzle lies at the other end of the spectrum, compounded by living in Beijing: what is an acceptable healthy weight and what is too thin?

While it's not unusual to see overweight older Chinese men here (not to mention the fair contingent of foreign faces with a beer gut to match), it's very rare to see a Chinese young woman with excessive weight problems.

Unlike their counterparts in the Western world, Chinese women have totally embraced "the winner is the thinner" mentality. Stick-thin models are the epitome of beauty. Many women admire those who have been under the knife to make them look thinner: facial reconstruction to achieve high cheekbones is growing in popularity here.

Perceptions of beauty and a healthy weight certainly couldn't be more different between West and East. While Chinese models may be size zero, the general feeling is that women should have a little more meat on their bones.

But how to judge what constitutes healthy weight? Well, the body mass index (BMI) is the most generally accepted guideline to work out whether Joe Public is within a healthy weight range for his height. The measurement is supported by the World Health Organization (WHO) and the Chinese government.

The method is simple: Take your weight (kg) and divide it by your height (m) squared (kg/m2). If your result is more than 25, like 63 percent of Americans, then you are overweight (except if you're one of the men with serious muscles at the higher end). Anywhere in between 18.5 and 24.9 is healthy, according to the WHO.

If the BMI is less than 18.5, then you are underweight and may suffer from malnutrition, an eating disorder or other health problems, according to doctors.

One would expect that a lot of Chinese women would fall in the underweight category and yet still want to diet. Indeed, a great number of young women in Beijing are constantly on a diet. Certainly many consistently talk about overeating and needing to lose weight while consuming what Westerners would consider a very small meal. Indeed, to Western eyes, many of the girls walking in the street look as if they might blow away with a strong gust of wind. Of course, to the Chinese, these women with tiny arms and legs are perfectly attractive and the sight of them even depresses other females who are aiming at such physical impossibility themselves.

People often speak of cultural differences, but this is certainly one of the more obvious manifestations of them. The fashion industry is derided in the West for creating negative and unrealistic ideals of beauty for young women. In Beijing these models are admired, while even some "thin" American actresses are categorized as needing to lose weight on Chinese forums.

Indeed, several friends who studied in the UK and the US said they felt happier about their weight while in another country as they seemed "thin" compared to the rest of the population, rather than "fat" in China.

Obviously one doesn't want excessive weight to become the extreme problem it has become in the Western world, but it does seem pertinent to try and address the unobtainable model of weight perfection obsessed over in China. If nothing else, the shift just might cheer up the population of younger women.

Arts major takes charge

Chinese-American girl says she doesn't seek fame, it chases her. William Axford finds out why.

Meilin Gray is as ambitious as they come, but that doesn't mean things have always been easy.

The 21-year-old Chinese-American singer has met a few tough challenges while chasing her dream of stardom in China. The first challenge was learning how to speak to her classmates. "I'm quite adventurous," Gray said. "I moved to a Chinese boarding school when I was 13 because I wanted to learn more about my half-Chinese background," said Gray, whose father is from California and whose mother hails from China.

"No one at the school spoke English and I didn't speak Chinese. I cried every day after school and called my parents at least five times a day."

Determined to fit in, Gray chose a few words a day and looked them up in a Chinese dictionary. She spent hours after school struggling to learn the words. Her hard work paid off and within a few months she was able to communicate well with her classmates.

Her trial by error method didn't stop there, though. The approach has helped her throughout her musical career, which sprouted in 2005.

"I started out on Beijing Television's Arts of Our Land show. It was like boot camp, and I had to learn a lot of things on the spot. But it was worth it."

Her experience on TV opened up other opportunities, such as working as a singer for Walt Disney Co shows in Asia.

Gray quickly found out that she had little creative control over her music. It's a conflict that clashed with her fierce need to create her own identity.

Turning down contracts for projects that raise the potential for instant success hasn't slowed her. Gray talks about her career with astute confidence and is all smiles when it comes to ruminating about the future.

"I'm not looking to be discovered," she said. "That's already happened before and it's not for me. It's making my own music that's important to me. You can have good packaging and a great publicist but if your music can't stand on its own, no one will remember you in five years," she said.

Currently taking a break from performing, Gray is finishing her last year of college at Tianjin Normal University, where she will obtain a degree in performing arts.

Despite a three-year break from the spotlight, the college student is very serious about education.

"I don't want to be one of those artists who know nothing," Gray said. "Education is important and it's good to enrich yourself."

After college she plans to realize her dreams - on her own terms. The strategy includes releasing a CD next year with songs in Chinese and English.

"I'm starting a record label called Mestere Records. Creative control is really important to me. All of my music is in-house and all my songs are written by me," said Gray, who has a website, www.meilin.me.

"I'm the kind of writer who writes from experience," she said. "If you can't relate to it, how can you expect anyone else to?

"This is the time to do it. I'm still young and can rest after I've realized my dreams," she said.

Q & A

Q: Do you do anything else beyond music?

A: Music is the most important thing but I act as well. I have been on a TV miniseries in Shanghai called Sophie's Diaries. I'm also going to start a fashion line next year. What fun is music without the fashion?

Q: How would you describe your music? What makes you stand apart from other singers?

A: My voice is unique, especially for the Chinese market. It has a poppy but "sandy" tone to it.

I'm both American and Chinese, so I want it to influence my music. It's a collaboration of East and West, a fusion of both.

Q: You're taking time from performing to focus on school. How has that worked out?

A: I feel like the last couple of years allowed me to grow up. I've focused more on discovering my sound and standing my ground when it comes to my music.

Q: You've lived in the US and various cities in China. How long do you plan to stay in Beijing?

A: Beijing is my home. I love it. At this point in my life, I'm not sure where I would rather live. It's fun. I love the international crowd.

Record breaker's wife aided success with carrots

As Adili Wuxor gave his final high wire performance above the Bird's Nest, his wife, Yiba Guli, acted out her own role of calm supporter in front of the media. Inside, she was burning with anxiety.

"If he says he wants to take part in another endurance event, I will definitely oppose it," she said, in reference to problems Adili felt during his successful record attempt.

Adili, a renowned wire-walking performer from Xinjiang, concluded his 60-day stay above the national stadium at 10:42 am on Friday, smashing several Guinness records. In particular, he set a record for the longest distance walked on a steel wire and the longest time spent at an elevated height.

During her 60-day stay in Beijing as his "biggest supporter", Guli went to watch her husband twice a day, regardless of rain or sun. She said the first thing she did after waking was to send him a text message with the number of days left.

As the performer's health worsened, Guli found herself making more than 10 calls a day to remind him of his courageous spirit. "He is a hero and an artist," she said. "The main reason he has done all this is to raise awareness of our culture and prove that Xinjiang people are brave."

But she was not only there to offer emotional support. As a wife, she wanted to give her partner a sense of their home, so she prepared all his favorite recipes.

Trouble struck though when Adili was advised by doctors to eat more carrots as a form of food therapy. Guli said she had to "strain her brain" to smuggle the foodstuff into his meals, dodging his massive aversion to the root vegetable.

"I also peeled and sliced his fruits," she said, noting that he would turn them down in any other form.

Guli is more than just a wife, she is Adili's promotion team manager, with responsibilities that include making costumes and running the group's daily activities. However, despite being a hardworking promoter and a trickster in the kitchen, she still suffers from intense nervousness when watching her husband walk the wire.

"When he hit 39, he was suddenly not as strong as before," Guli said, adding that she has been secretly trying to persuade her husband to end his career.

For Adili though, his lofted position allows him to view his next horizon with ease - a possible walk cross the Taiwan straits, to take place sometime next year.

Forgotten folks need love and support from children

There is nothing so natural as children leaving the nest when they find a job or get a place at university, but that doesn't make it any easier for the parents.

Far from concerns about their children's safety is a much more pressing matter - intense loneliness felt by mom and dad, sadly labeled as the "empty nesters".

An empty nester chats with a nurse at the Songtang Hospice in the capital.

"I am so lonely. My wife passed away seven years ago and my daughter, who now lives in the United States, can only come back twice a year. I feel forgotten," said Wang Zhong, 62, a retired college teacher living in Changying in Chaoyang district.

Wang said life was more tolerable when he was working, but retirement brought it to a grinding halt.

"The sudden change was hard to accept," he said.

Wang is among an estimated 500,000 "empty nesters" in Beijing.

A recent survey by several Beijing-based medias on 5,000 people in a similar situation in the capital revealed that more than 60 percent described themselves as "lonely".

"The rapidly expanding number of elderly people will become a major social issue," said Wu Shimin, director of the Beijing Aging Committee.

Statistics from the committee showed the annual increase in the elderly was 2.5 percent in the 1980s.

More than 20 years of accelerated growth in the city however has accumulated about 2.5 million people aged over 60, accounting for some 17 percent of the total population.

That figure will continue to climb, to 3.5 million by 2020 and then 6.5 million by 2050.

Giving encouragement to the elderly is necessary, but quite a challenge.

And with the increase will be a spur in "empty nesters", made likely by improved living conditions and higher salaries that encourage young people to leave home and move into their own apartments.

"The elderly will really need help from society; not just financial but also psychological assistance from professionals and family members," said Yang Ping, a doctor from Beijing Psychological Center for Elderly People.

The center set up a hotline in April 2007, to provide a free and daily consultation service to elderly people. It receives about 3,000 calls annually and also arranges face-to-face meetings in communities.

"Our operators are trained by medical professionals. However, while they are skilled in providing advice, we still believe that the best way to counter depression is when the family takes an active role," Yang said.

She said most senior citizens' feelings of insecurity could not be resolved by the hotline. Instead, a loving attitude from children, sometimes even just a phone call, can make a dramatic difference.

"They should also get outside and take part in social activities," said a retired worker surnamed Zhang in Huilongguan, Changping district.

He leads an elderly people's modeling club. They hold regular training programs on the weekends and also give occasional performances of fashion shows.

"My advice is to do whatever makes you happy. The best way to end loneliness is to replace it with something else, perhaps a hobby," he said.

The municipal government and the Beijing Aging Committee launched a joint project last year to improve the lives of the elderly. More than 40,000 elderly residents were given emergency response buttons, linked directly to neighboring clinics.

Beijing has about 300 nursing homes and 2,300 senior citizens' activities centers.

And Dongzhimen went one step further by opening a special street for the elderly on June 29. Restaurants, hairdressers and dry cleaners were just some of the shops intended to make life easier for local seniors.

"All 12 stores will provide special services to seniors, at discount prices. The clinics can provide traditional Chinese treatment," said Zhao Chenjie, an official from the Dongzhimen neighborhood office.

But it is not just access to material goods that will benefit them.

Zhu Lin, a doctor at Beijing-based Songtang Hospice, said giving encouragement to the elderly is necessary, but quite a challenge.

Songtang Hospice, which cares for both the elderly and terminally ill patients, has access to hundreds of volunteers.

"However, it is really hard to provoke a positive attitude among the elderly unless the helper has professional training," he said.

Zhu said that while the volunteers might not help the elderly much in psychological issues, it is usually an eye opener for their own lives.

Follow your instincts, not a list of requirements

Our male cat started to get fidgety after he turned one year old.

In order for him to enjoy a family life as well, my boyfriend and I decided to get our cat a girlfriend.

A couple of days ago, we contacted the dealer we bought our cat from last year and visited his home again, where he kept more than 50 purebred cats.

We wanted a female and felt she should be the same breed as ours - Scottish shorthair and blue in color, about one year old and with straight ears, since our first cat has folded ears.

It turned out that only a few cats met our needs, and they were way too expensive: all above 4,000 yuan, which was more than twice the price we paid for our first cat.

But there was one, the right age, right gender and at a suitable price - but she had the wrong face. She didn't look good and was very aggressive to us both.

We didn't take a cat home with us that day, after long consideration.

The next day, I met an old college classmate who I hadn't seen for a long time. We were both so delighted and began to catch up immediately. During the conversation, the single girl whined to me about how hard it was to find a boyfriend.

She wanted a man who was older than her, but not too old. Someone with career ambitions, his own apartment and car. Someone who was sweet, caring, smart, humorous, romantic and loyal.

As she kept on listing her requirements, I started to wonder whether she was asking for too much?

And then it hit me that the same thing happened when I was looking for a cat - way too many criteria.

I remember when we bought our cat last year, there was no expectation at all. We went to the dealer's just for fun and it just happened that we fell in love with the adorable Scottish "boy" and spent all the money we had on getting him. This time, it turned out to be so hard to find satisfaction because of all the criteria we had in mind.

Once you start to have criterions, the price goes straight up.

Worse still, I realized that we were even more demanding than we expected to be. In addition to price, look and temperament also turned out to be issues - otherwise we would have taken the not good looking one.

And people are not just like that about cats and relationships. We're the same with jobs, apartments, food, friends and so on.

We have formed certain likes and dislikes of our own and began to make demands with everything we come across. And the older we are, the longer we wait, the pickier we become.

I couldn't help but wonder: are our criteria making things more complicated and our life harder? Are we trapped by our own requirements?

Maybe life would be much more fun if we live it with less expectation and more curiosity.

Your requirements toward anything could be easily destroyed as things change. Just keep the most important ones in mind and for the rest, let nature decide.

Perhaps you should forget about your plans and judgments and just choose the man you cannot help but want to kiss.

Our male cat ended up getting a young girlfriend. After we found out how expensive female cats of the same breed were, we bought a beautiful "girl" that was less than two months old. She was reasonably priced and fulfilled all the important factors that we valued; only apparently, our male cat needs much more patience now.

You just never get it all.

If you're shy male

Modest? Shy? Reluctant to tell everyone how brilliant you are? If you're male, you can probably add 'single' to that list.

Instead, cocky types are more likely to win their hearts, with Simon Cowell's arrogant attitude more appealing than Hugh Grant's bumbling on-screen behaviour.

　

The three female researchers showed more than 200 people videotapes of a man and a woman applying for a job as a computer lab manager.

The volunteers were asked to rate them for modesty, likeability and a range of other factors. Despite the actors being equally qualified for the job, the man was liked less than the woman.

Professor Laurie Rudman, of Rutgers University in New Jersey, said: 'Our findings demonstrate that men encounter prejudice when they behave modestly. 'They also raise the possibility that men may avoid behaving modestly because they risk backlash when they do.

The sexiest World Cup players are exposed

Footballing hunks across the globe are getting ready to put on the show of their lives – for us ladies at home. The sexiest World Cup players are exposed.

England's Frank Lampard

Plays for: Chelsea

Best bits: Frank has chiselled good looks and nice legs, but he’s also a big softie. His goal celebration consists of pointing to the sky, a tribute to his mum Pat, who died in 2008. Frank also has an IQ of 154, which puts him in the ‘Very Superior Intelligence’ bracket. No excuse for him saying, ‘We woz robbed’ and such like, then.

Earnings: Frank’s on 135,000 pounds a week

Love life: Has two kids with Elen Rives, and is now dating Christine Bleakley.

Portugal's Cristiano Ronaldo, 25

Plays for: Real Madrid

Best bits: Firm, tanned torso when he strips off his shirt (every five minutes)， that cheeky wink (OK, it got him into trouble/hate mail, but we still like it)

Earnings: Second only to David Beckham when it comes to cash, pulling in more than 20 million pounds a year in wages and endorsements, like that Armani ad. You know, the one that makes us feel funny.

Love life: He’s hot single property, being linked to Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton.

Ivory Coast's Didier Drogba, 32

Plays for: Chelsea

Best bits: Africa’s biggest footballing star is gorge and brave. He saved his country from war by falling to his knees on live TV and begged warring factions to make peace. So they did. Try that Rooney!

Earnings: He’s worth about 16m pounds

Love life: He and wife Alla have three sons. Can’t wait for them to grow up.

France's William Gallas, 32

Plays for: Arsenal

Best bits: He’s a hunkaspunk, all brooding looks and big guns. Never mind the footie, we want tickets to THAT gun show

Earnings: Earns 80,000 pounds a week. But he’s in a contract wrangle with Arsenal, so may not be earning that for much longer

Love life: Married exotic stunner Nadege. They met as teens and got hitched last year. He has an eight-year-old daughter, Lea, from a previous relationship.

Brazil's Kaka, 28

Plays for: Real Madrid

Best bits: His name might make you giggle (his baby bro named him that because he couldn’t pronounce ‘Ricardo’) but he’s still tall, dark and handsome with a killer smile

Earnings: Sponsorship with Adidas and modelling for Armani boosts his yearly earning well over the ?20 million mark

Love life: Kaka is very religious and married Caroline Celico at Christmas 2005 in S?o Paulo. Their first child, Luca Celico Leite, was born in 2008.